Fingers Crossed!

You guys! I just found out that Yoga Kula SF has some classes opening up!

Please keep your fingers crossed that they take me into consideration as a teacher there!

xoxoxoxoxo

First cold Friday in November...thoughts and wishes.

This is most certainly an incredible time to be alive.

I thought "hope" was what I felt when we elected Obama; this current is pouring forth from an entirely different wellspring.

I was 17 when the planes hit the two towers. A decade later, I feel my power returning.

Not just mine, all of ours, the collective. It's a cautious excitement, but an excitement nonetheless.

What joy to witness a movement that truly cuts through all ideological lines, you know? An evolution from the power center to the heart, a visible, upward moving connection.

The stakes are higher than they have ever been. And we are rising to the occasion.

I changed over to a credit union today. I was tempted to hop into H&M and peruse the fall merchandise, but I abstained; as alluring as those prices are I am committed to bolstering community with every action, this includes where I use mah monies.

The stakes feel higher inside too. No more lies. No more shirking responsibility. Most of all, no more excuses.

I am so tired of excuses.

May each moment be an opportunity to serve the highest. May we all have the courage to be nonviolent harbingers of TRUTH.

Tomorrow 11am I am assisting Katchie's class, then quick lunch, then will be heading down to march if anyone wants to join...

I'll leave you with this, it's been keeping me going all week, by the incomparable Martha Graham:

"There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open."

Sigue siguiendo

Things are trundling along. Seven people came to my Monday night class last week, a new record for me in that space so I am excited and humbled and working extra hard to make sure my classes are varied, fun, and challenging to the myriad of levels that are attending lately. The most exciting part is that the students are repeats; that is to say, it wasn't random that seven people showed up that night, I play a part in their presence at my class...suffice to say that I'm doing something right, and I'll be honest, after almost a year of barely one or two people showing up, it feels really good.


Next week is the one year anniversary of the first class I ever taught at Balance in Motion. Teaching yoga is absolutely 100% the opposite of what I imagined it would be during the year I was perpetually enrolled in various trainings and workshops, the year that I attended yoga classes at least five times/week, (even working at the studio to balance this passion--my biggest expense aside from rent), the year I was more-or-less sober and celibate, the year I (and here's where some yogi-speak comes in) remembered my essential nature, and finally stopped filling up the gaps with ridiculous, short-term flings, or searching for answers at the bottom of a pint. I had multiple dreams, vivid, realistic dreams of giving birth, my belly full and ripe; I'd wake up trembling, not so much from the actual details of the dream but from the fact that I knew in my heart I was giving birth to a new part of myself, a delicate, vulnerable part that I would have to hold close and nurture to fruition. It was an exciting time.

Cut to nearly exactly a year to the day later--I experienced some health issues that were quite the opposite of giving birth to something. I won't go into detail here because it's not the place but it was a sharp juxtaposition from my previous year of growth-in both cases, my internal landscape manifested itself physically. I was scared. I had forgotten, in my excitement, that for anything to truly blossom and flourish, old growth must be cut away to make room for the new. I learned that sometimes it feels liberating and expansive to let go of the old; other times, it sucks and I want to do whatever it takes to hold on to it, even after it's no longer useful. It's that old metaphor about the plant: if you don't transfer a plant every so often, it becomes root bound and dies. Same goes for us--my question is, why is the new pot so damn terrifying???


It is a difficult lesson to learn, and one I am still learning, every day. The yoga practice has illuminated the very aspects of myself that I used to run from. I don't know why I ever thought this would be easy! Because it's not, it's actually really fucking intense. That's why this practice works. It's uplifting in that it celebrates all the wonderful things that make you who you are; but it's also really hardcore sometimes to have this very honest mirror held constantly in front of you, and to STILL keep coming back day after day to your mat as a student, practicing, inquiring, listening. I know there is this stereotype of the always-blissed-out yogi, and while I have had moments like that, I've also had the opposite: moments where I feel like a dragon and all I want to do is spit fire at the instructor; or moments at home, where I roll out my mat only to do a couple poses before bursting into tears. I'm not going to tell you it's fun all the time, because that would be a lie, and I'm trying not to do that anymore...


Teaching yoga is an honor and a privilege. I am working on breathing into the growing pains, recognizing when I start to feel anxious about the new growth, and moving forward anyway. It's hard, but it's so worth it. See you on the mat! xoxox

Just what I needed to hear!

Look what the universe sent me this morning:

"I still don't get why people are so surprised that the turtle beat the rabbit over the long run.


Consistent effort, Dani, no matter how small, sparks magic, fills sails, butters bread, turns tides, instills faith, summons friends, improves health, burns calories, creates abundance, yields clarity, builds courage, spins planets, and rewrites destinies."

It's especially welcome as I FINALLY last night updated my yoga fliers and created/purchased updated business cards! It might sound small but it is something, I'm slightly embarrassed to report, I have been putting off for the past 10 months...maybe longer.

These little reminders are so tremendous--I don't know about all of you but I certainly, sometimes on a daily basis, feel like I'm banging my head against a wall. The bigger picture, the greater vision, is so clear, I just want to sink my teeth into it already: and then when I think about how far away I feel from the end result, I can't help but feel bogged down about the state of everything...(initiate thought pattern of doom).

And then I remember! That everything I do is one step closer to the greater vision, that there is no backsliding on the path, that I am doing the best I can, and there is plenty of room for me too, and my particular brand of passion and humor and desire. Sometimes all it takes to tune back into that remembrance is an anonymous email in my inbox on a bright Tuesday morning, on an early fall day, in the glorious city of San Francisco.

Thanks for reading, and remember, "...without you, space, time, and everywhere ever thought of would be far less."

Also, I find it excellent that the universe sounds decidedly like Tom Robbins....
LOVE

Happy Friday!

What's the good word this weekend? If any of y'all are interested, tomorrow morning I'll be at Katchie's 11 AM yoga class @ Yoga Kula, followed by lunch at Stable Cafe, hands down my favorite cafe in the city...

Want to join?

Wishing you all a sunshine filled weekend!

<3

Last night...

..... my teacher said something in class that hit me real good. She said many incredible things, as she is priestess/warrior/sage/yogini, but this one thing stood out in particular:

"By giving up thinking about how things should be, we can get present to how things actually are."

Simple, no? In that instance, she was referring specifically to asana, how, so often, as we are going through the physical motions in yoga class, we get so caught up in how we look: how our pose compares to the person next to us; how, jeez, I've been practicing this pose for years, why can't I just touch my toes/lift my leg higher/stretch my hamstrings et al a little farther; how, if I could just push my foot a little farther or suck my gut in a little more, I would be better... before we know it, we've gotten so caught up in "shoulding" ourselves that we've missed out on the pose completely.

I'm telling you, this blew my mind. I've heard this before but last night, it dug in a little more. Sometimes it's the seemingly simplest of teachings that hit the deepest.

I should all over myself all the damn time... and not just on my yoga mat.

I should have more money saved.

I should be working harder!

I shouldn't eat/drink/smoke/try/indulge/desire/trust/say that. I definitely shouldn't wear that...

I should feel more passion for my job.

I should already be farther along my path than where I am.

I should be more productive!

Sound familiar? The list could go on and on.

My teacher has this uncanny ability to speak to exactly what is going on in our lives--a little three second blurb in an hour and a half class has the ability to pierce right through the bullshit and hit me right where I need it most.

When we come to our mats at the beginning of our practice, but also as we initiate every pose, the first step is to soften simply to what is; open ourselves to the bigger picture, expand our perspective, and accept what is in front of us. Then, into that spaciousness, we organize our bodies in such a way that is optimal, regardless of body type, past injury, pain, and so on. Closing our eyes, breathing deeply, maybe the deepest you've ever breathed before, we drop out of our busy brains and into our bodies, and it is in this sweet spot that yoga occurs.

What I'm trying to say is that we already put enough pressure on ourselves in this foot-always-on-the-gas-pedal culture of ours; yoga doesn't have to be yet another masochistic activity we cram ourselves through. We practice getting present to and creating space around the physical postures during yoga class in the hopes that one day, that presence will trickle over into our "real lives." Once this starts to happen, our experience of life starts to shift, and we create space there too- around our relationships, in our careers, with our creative ideas and projects, and our daily interactions start to flow from this place of space, and we are no longer living at the mercy of habitual patterns and reactions.

What I'm trying to say is, be kinder. Yes, to everyone around you, but first, to your sweet sweet self. Our time is so valuable--don't waste it spending time with the should monster. Enjoy the people in your life-really take time to sit down and listen to them. Go for walks. Touch the things around you. Lay down in the grass. Move your body!

I'm excited to have this little teaching be my guiding light for the next cycle; my practice is going to be, when I catch my self "shoulding," I'm going to stop whatever I'm doing and take 10 long, deep, soulful breaths. I would love for you to join me.

And for you cynics, another nice side effect of the practice is long, leaner muscles, and a stronger core from the inside out. But don't take it from me, try it yourself!

Where do you should yourself? What other practices do you take to ground or return to the present?